Doomed to Repetition...

4 years ago this November, I quit my position as Sales slave boy for the great corporate juggernaut, abandoning the shackles for what I thought was the wide open and equitable frontier of a small arts business. My new bosses name was Jennifer. She was an actress. My wife already worked for her. She lured me with assurances that I would be well received and well compensated. 3 debilitating months later, I began petitioning to be re-fitted for my shackles, to have what remained of my wrecked soul again surrendered to the everavenous jaws of the publicly traded carnivore N******.
In less than 1 month, I will again tender my resignation [I still have the original one, to which I will make a couple of embellishments and re-use for economy and elegiacy], leap over the cyclone fence that surrounds my lonely cube and again cry freedom. Only this time, I will be going to embrace the spirit of exuberance and optimism at...a small arts business. My new bosses name is Jennifer. She is an actress. My wife already works for her. She has lured me with assurances that I will be well received and well compensated.
3 doing-my-best-to-ignore-the-frightening-similarities-to-the-disastrous-past
and-yet-still-remain-hopeful months from now, I will find myself facing a familiar situation. Don't ask me why, and this is beyond a stretch for me, but I actually feel like it is going to work. I'm sure you'll hear about it if it doesn't.

And a final note. My boss just informed me that he realized he had just traveled by air from Philadelphia to Atlanta with a loaded .32 automatic in his carry-on luggage. Whereas they made him pull out his diabetic contraption so that they could scour and probe, they seemed unconcerned about the firearm loaded with exploding rounds at the bottom of the bag.
Fly the friendly skies. Fly them packing. Just don't bring a 4 oz. bottle of Purell. Word is, those are the only things killing people these days...

'Dark Knight' Mostly Succeeds as Social Commentary

I saw it. Last night. Dark Knight. I was only part of the record breaking opening weekend in spirit, I'm afraid. So, some thoughts...
You know what I like (perhaps) most about this film, and really, the entire Batmythology? No mutants. Good, bad, politic, punk, these are all people. They may be extreme, whether in wealth or skill or ethos or pathos, however you want to angle it. But, they are human. I think, for the purpose of a film like this, it gives the actors a nice anchor. Unlike the X-Movies, where the super heroes get to be human, it's the other way around. The film treats this as a central theme, and allows us to embrace it.
Acting. Whew. First off, Heath Ledgers performance is not just hype. I doubt there will be any (unwarranted) artificial amplification of the caliber of his Joker. Don't compare him to Jack Nicholson. That's like saying Jude Law is no Peter O'Toole. Give him 30 years of constant work like Jack had before his Joker. Who's to say? I must say, he played a phenomenal Joker. I began reading Batman comics in the late 80's, I'd say. A Death in the Family, Year 1, the Dark Knight, the Killing Joke, Arkham Asylum, these were the titles of the Gotham stories of the day. If we had all read them with post 9/11 eyes instead of widened pre-millennium eyes, I really think Chris Nolan's current interpretation would have replaced Tim Burton's. But, then again, sign of the times. Ledger's matter of fact rendition, change though it does, of his disfigurement throughout the film is perhaps the central parable. Terrible things have happened and are happening, and everyone is searching for meaning behind it, perhaps attempting to take the first few steps, as is our Western fashion, towards a solution. But the simple linear path from cause to effect, axis to ally, is no longer surely drawn. The world is devolving, blurring, and Chaos is the only fair game left.
Aaron Eckhart's D.A. Harvey Dent/Two Face is another example of this. The conviction which he clings to early in the film is so horribly shaken that by the end, he has surrendered himself to living in a world of random absolutes, black or white, heads or dead. Oddly, I was in the middle of preparing a blog yesterday that I never finished where I described something of a reverse arc in my own life. Absolutes are appealing, as they erase the gray areas of emotional upset, moral ambiguity, basically all that is human and fallible. I've always liked Eckhart, and I continue to here.
Let me just be the devil's advocate (literally, if you read the papers) and say that I quite enjoy Christian Bale. I just do. I don't even have a solid reason why. There's something just a little unnerving about him in every role he plays, but it could just be his 'method' of taking on someone else. There are some actors who just have this Jekyll and Hyde thing going on when they perform, and no matter how well they play a character, or how likable that character is, you get this creepy Hyde feeling. Maybe I just can't ever get American Psycho out of my head when I see him. With the Batman, I have to say, despite his slightly too forced affectedness (to distinguish between Bruce Wayne and the Bat, no doubt), I think he lands squarely in the ballpark of who the tormented vigilante really is. This is a dark character. The title should give you that. He isn't rescuing kittens from trees, and he isn't awkwardly bumbling around the bat cave in bear slippers when not karate chopping petty larcenists. He's a tormented man, full of loneliness and loss, vast wealth and influence, and in most cases, unsung sacrifice. That's a hard thing to be. It makes you hang people outside of buildings sometimes (several times), but you don't drop them. Those are the rules. Still, with the bulk of his dialogue being somewhat cliched moral ponderances, he gives them a fair read.
I won't go on about the many other talented actors in the film, but there are many, and they, as always, deliver. It's not for kids. No more than anything else is these days, including the news. It's not for people who want to see caped heroes clearing a room of thugs and then dance the Batusi. It's difficult to see, because it isn't so far off. I even found myself wondering if the boat scene at the end wouldn't go differently if this were re-envisioned another 15 years from now. Go see it, and don't be surprised when you see the sequel--"Darker Knight".

Contemplating the Curse...

"Cursed is the ground because of you;
through painful toil you will eat of it
all the days of your life.

18 It will produce thorns and thistles for you,
and you will eat the plants of the field.

19 By the sweat of your brow
you will eat your food
until you return to the ground,
since from it you were taken;
for dust you are
and to dust you will return."

I come from a long line of farmers. Some skilled tradesmen, here and there, but for the most part, hardworking, leatherskinned, swollenjointed farmers. People who, whether they put stock in the Bible or not, lived out and understood well the 'curse' handed down in Genesis. There are still many millions who do. I've begun to question whether I am among them lately. You see, I don't till the soil, nor do I wash the dirt from the harvest with the sweat of my brow before it gets boiled and plated at my table. But I do work. A lot. I've always tried to keep myself busy, as a farmer might, from morning until evening. I've always had to work to bring in the harvest, only mine came processed from the supermarket, or emerged sizzling from the grills and grease vats of the local fast foodaurant.
Interesting side note. Entymology of the word 'restaurant': 1827, from the French for "food that restores". The prefix 'rest-' got me thinking. I want someone to open the 'Bestaurant'. Maybe next year...

Anyway, work. I work for a corporation in a Sales capacity. On one hand, it feels like the furthest thing from 'working the earth' as there can be. It's all about people getting fat sitting in cubicles with money being thrown around like confetti falling on some endless parade (rarely in my direction, mind you, but I see it on the wind now and again). It's all about old men spending their lives in the office while younger women raise their children, clean their homes, answer their calls. I have come to despise the culture here, and to despise the person it has helped me to become while here. As a result, it has become very stressful, & feels like dying a little every time I come in. I see my body changing, ticks developing. My mood is perpetually raw, and the coffee mug that once sat half empty on my desk is now brimming over with negativity. The more I think about it, the more I wonder if this is the corporate version of the Curse. There is no dirt here, but I still feel dirty. There is no sweat pouring from my brow, but a storm cloud sits there now from morning to night. My plow and thresher are a hard drive and an office cart. And from within all the dichotomies here, there arises one common denominator: Knowledge.
It was knowledge that brought with it the curse for Adam. He chewed through the veneer of perfection and awoke to the innate fallibility of created things that are allowed to fend for themselves. It is the knowledge that my boss passes on to us regarding the way decisions are made around here, of the general unethical practices constantly employed, which is burdening me almost beyond what I can bear. With much knowledge comes much sorrow. I think that's from King Solomon. He would know. He had the best seat in the house for awhile, CEO of Holy Land Enterprises. I wonder if his message takers had our contempt?
Anyway, I'm an American and a man, and being such, I fix things. So, I anticipate a fix shortly...

for MMKB

(I found this from my road ramblings--things I wrote while traveling around for the cellular security company. It's nothing special, but I had forgotten about it. Maybe I hope it's a beacon.)

Melting candles, anime
Dreams that have too much to say
that chase you well into the day

Dirty carpet, pleather boots
Writhing limbs instead of roots
Rotting unforbidden fruit

Brilliant mind, razor wit
The tide of anger shifts a bit
I am not controlling it

Foolish me to think I can
A common foolishness for man
Realizing it, I ran

Surprised my mother; surprised me, too
Different reasons behind the two
Always thought I'd be stuck with you
Now I miss the friend I knew

I hope I see you down the line
Write a letter, interpret a sign
Share some stories, yours and mine

Be safe; find anything but pain
My prayers will go to you again